Halloween is upon us once again, little gremlins. This year’s Halloween was supposed to be legendary. It’s on a Saturday… on a full moon (a rare blue moon, to be exact)... and marks the end of Daylight Savings Time. Rarely is there such a perfect setting for Halloween antics! Alas, it was not meant to be. With social distancing and such, this year’s Halloween celebration won’t be the epic party that so many of us anticipated. But hey, at least we get to keep wearing masks for the rest of the year… so there’s that, I guess?
In the ongoing horror show of 2020, what are most of us doing on a Halloween where we can’t have huge costume parties? Howl at the big blue moon, I guess… and binge watch scary movies, of course!
In honor of the most sacred Halloween tradition of huddling together to watch horror movies, we give you the Top 10 ICD-10 Codes for Horror Movie Survivors.
1. T75.01X – Shock due to being struck by lightning
It was a dark and stormy night… as most scary stories begin. If you find yourself in a horror movie, you should definitely refrain from standing in the middle of an open field during a lightning storm whilst holding a long metal object. Otherwise, this code may have to be used to diagnose you (if you survive).
2. W29.3XXA – Contact with garden and outdoor hand tools and machinery, initial encounter
Is it just me, or does it seem like the mass murderers in horror films always acquire their weaponry from a well-stocked tool shed? Seriously. They almost never come after people with a proper weapon like a gun or a sword. It’s always a machete, an axe, an exhaust spitting chainsaw (that never seems to run out of gas) or some other gardening or woodworking implement. Well, the good news for those who survive these attacks (aside from the fact that they survived, of course) is that there is an ICD-10 code for it.
3. W31.2XXA – Contact with powered woodworking and forming machines, initial encounter
Not all horror movies are some masked madman chasing terrified teenagers through the woods with a handy gardening tool. Sometimes, the killer brings victims back to his (or her) lair. If this happens, the victims face being thrown into a woodchipper (or accidentally falling into it on their own), or they might even get dismembered via table saw. Of course, if the cops show up it can be difficult to explain why there’s blood all over your woodchipper (if you haven’t seen Tucker and Dale vs. Evil, you should… it is both scary and hilarious).
4. W29.4XXA – Contact with a nail gun, initial encounter
When horror movie murderers absolutely, positively have to pick off their victims from a (relatively short) distance, accept no substitute. Why use a regular gun when you can use one that shoots nails? I mean… that’s way scarier, right?
5. S1087XA – Other superficial bite of other specified part of the neck
Have you ever gone to bed and forgot to put that garlic wreath around your neck and woken up to find you’d been bitten by a vampire? Me too. Happens to the best of us. Luckily there’s an ICD-10 code for that (anyone else bursting into flames when they step into the sunlight? Or is that just me?)
6. Y92.253 – Injured at an opera house
I feel like this code would have come in rather handy for every single character in The Phantom of the Opera (both the Michael Crawford and Gerard Butler versions).
7. R46.1 – Bizarre personal appearance
Speaking of The Phantom of the Opera, you’re going to need this code if you are brave enough to snatch off the Phantom’s mask. If you choose to do so, however, I would recommend you start running immediately afterwards.
8. X52 – Prolonged stay in a weightless environment
This code already made it into our Top 10 Most Hilarious ICD-10 Codes blog from a few years back. And to this day, I am perplexed by the fact that it is categorized under “accidental exposure.” It leads one to wonder just how someone accidentally ends up in a zero gravity environment. My conclusion remains now as it was then—alien abduction. When the extraterrestrials come for you, no worries. ICD-10 has got you covered.
9. V95.43XS – Spacecraft Collision Injuring Occupant
Then, of course, you have those times when an alien abduction goes horribly wrong and ends with an intergalactic fender bender. Or maybe they’re just looking to the future, when we’ll have space bumper cars. Maybe it’s for space war. Who knows?
10. F40.233 – Fear of injury
With all this talk of horror movie injuries, some people might become a little fearful of getting injured. For someone who managed to survive a horror movie, you’d think it’s perfectly reasonable to be afraid it might happen again… very afraid. Well, if your fear of injury gets overwhelming, this ICD-10 code is for you.
Happy Halloween, folks! May the Great Pumpkin bless you with candy and shenanigans!